The Last of the Pelican Daughters (NHB Modern Plays) by The Wardrobe Ensemble
Author:The Wardrobe Ensemble [Ensemble, The Wardrobe]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Nick Hern Books
Chapter Three â The Presentation
STORM. Okay, right, check that works, great. Everyone ready?
JOY. Yeah.
STORM. So, weâre gathered here today to celebrate Mum.
Projection: âRosemary Pelican 1953â2020â.
Mum was an amazing person, she was kindâ¦
Projection: âkindâ (written in funky clip-art).
Generousâ¦
Projection: âgenerousâ (written in funky clip-art).
Lovingâ¦
Projection: âlovingâ (written in funky clip-art).
â¦and she didnât mind being a bit silly sometimes too.
Projection: âsillyâ (written in funky clip-art).
And we all loved her very much.
SAGE. This is really weird and lovely, Stormy.
STORM. Thanks. Now, as you all know Mum was never very interested in her finances.
MAYA. You can say that again!
STORM. And she didnât leave the most detailed will in the world, but on page fourâ¦
Projection: Image of excerpt from will.
â¦as Iâve mentioned before, it says: âMy estate and assets should be divided fairly between my children.â Note the wording here, âfairlyâ â
Projection: Image of excerpt from will with âfairlyâ underlined.
â¦not equally.
Now itâs taken Joy and I the last eight months to sort out all the paperwork to sell the house but thatâs all done now, so thanks, Joy, for helping with that.
JOY. No problem.
STORM. And it looks like, after fees, we should be left with aboutâ¦
Projection: â£250,000â.
â¦two hundred and fifty thousand, so roughly fifty grand each.
Projection: Graph of how money is divided.
However, given the amount of time I spent caring for Mum, I think it would be fair for us to each shave a littleâ¦
Projection: Amended graph of how money is divided.
â¦off the top of our amounts, to pay me for that time.
Projection: âThank youâ cute cat image.
Silence.
SAGE. Are you serious?
STORM. What Iâm suggesting is that we shave ten thousand pounds â
Projection: â£10,000 x 4 = £40,000â.
â¦off everyoneâs total, so that we can pay me a modest salary, fifteen thousand a yearâ¦
Projection: â£10,000 x 4 = £40,000 = 2.5 years at £15,000 per yearâ.
â¦for two-and-a-half years of looking after Mum. I think thatâs fair.
MAYA. Huh.
JOY. Youâre asking us to pay you a salary?
STORM. Okay not a salary, more a gesture of goodwill. Compensation for that time, for that unpaid labour.
MAYA. Okay. Storm, I donât think you can just decideâ¦
SAGE. Why are you doing this now?
MAYA. Shouldnât Luke be here to talk about this?
STORM. Iâve already spoken to him, he said heâs happy with what Iâm suggesting and he couldnât be bothered to come.
JOY. Typical.
STORM. And this isnât me deciding, itâs a request from your sister. Itâs why I wanted us all to come together.
SAGE. Thatâs not why! Weâre here to celebrate Mumâs birthday.
STORM. And we are. We are!
SAGE. Youâre making this about money and paperwork. She hated all of that shit.
MAYA. I thought you got paid?
STORM. Carerâs allowance.
MAYA. Yeah.
JOY. Itâs not a lot.
STORM. Sixty-four pounds a week.
JOY. Just over three grand a year, yes. Look, Storm, I know how much work you did. But if weâre talking about finances, you also lived in this house, rent-free.
STORM. I lost two years of my life, Joy. I was going to go⦠I was going to⦠I had plans!
JOY. But you made that choice and we supported you, when you said you would do it.
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